


Revelation

by 6_impossiblethings



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe, Demisexuality, Jealousy, M/M, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-10-17 09:47:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20618999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/6_impossiblethings/pseuds/6_impossiblethings
Summary: Neil and Andrew have been friends and roommates for years now. Andrew's casual hook ups are starting to bother Neil, but he can't figure out why. He's never been bothered by this before but can't figure out what it is. Maybe he won't be as bothered when he's the one Andrew is interested in.Basically a story where Neil discovers he isn't quite as asexual as he once thought. Loosely based on a Tumblr post I read recently.





	1. Chapter 1

Neil opened his apartment door surprised to find Andrew back from class already. They had been roommates since sophomore year and Neil knew he usually went to the gym after his classes. Which he purposefully scheduled in the afternoon so he could sleep in.

"What are you doing back already?"

"I'm avoiding Nicky."

"Oh? And he won't check the apartment?"

"He will probably spend all his time looking for me at the gym and getting distracted by all the guys weight lifting."

"Fair honestly. Why are you hiding from him again?"

"He says I need to be more social."

"And avoiding him is proving him wrong how?

"No one likes a smart mouth."

"Except you. Maybe I'll give Nicky a call and tell him to come over."

Andrew gave him a dirty look. "If you do he's just going to bother you about setting you up with someone again."

"Good point. Hiding from Nicky it is."

Neil hadn't hated anyone for a while. After he and Andrew moved in together, he had slowly stopped seeing Melissa. They hadn't progressed more than casually hooking up but Neil was beginning to get annoyed by her presence and Andrew hadn't liked her much. Besides, Neil wasn't ever really interested in anyone. She had kept flirting with him that he convinced himself to give it all a try.

He broke things off with her and hadn't wanted to try with anyone else again. Neil was beginning to consider himself somewhere on the ace scale but he was content with that. He had a few great friends and that's all he needed to surround himself with. He never felt jealous seeing the others in their relationships.

Nicky just got annoying sometimes. He kept insisting Neil would find the right person eventually and that would change everything. He was just so happy in his relationship with Erik that he wanted the same for everyone. Good intentions really, but Neil was glad he had finally started to back off.

Neil thought Andrew was lucky. He came out to Neil when they moved in together but was always so discreet with his hook ups that Neil barely noticed when random guys came over or when Andrew slipped away at Eden's to hook up with the bartender. 

Neil was pretty sure Nicky, Aaron, and Kevin had yet to notice. If Neil had to guess, Renee might be the only other one from their little friend group who knew the truth. 

They made dinner and did homework. A little later, someone knocked on their door.

Neil jumped up to grab it since Andrew most likely wouldn't. Really the only people who showed up unexpected were Matt, Allison, and Nicky. Odds were Neil would have to entertain whoever it was anyways.

Unexpectedly, he opened the door to Jake, a guy from his Spanish class standing there. 

"Um hi, is Andrew there?"

"Is he expecting you?"

Andrew called out from the kitchen, "Neil let him in."

He was surprised Andrew was having someone over and even more so that he had not mentioned anything. It wasn't like Andrew to have people over out of the blue. 

Neil instantly realized why he was there about one minute later when they both went right to Andrew's room and shut the door.

He felt a weird disappointment at this. He wanted to watch this movie tonight with Andrew that Matt had been telling him about. He knew it could wait but still. Andrew was ditching him to be with that other guy? Not like he could blame him. Even if Neil didn't have needs, it was clear other people did.

But still that guy was who Andrew wanted to hang out with? Neil thought he seemed more Nicky's type. Still, it wasn't Neil's business. He wouldn't say anything to Andrew about it. He had no right to judge considering he wasn't really in the same situation. He wanted to be glad for Andrew. They both knew how homophonic people could be. Nicky had been attacked before when he was out with Erik once. Neil wondered if this was what made Andrew so discreet about his sexuality. Andrew also knew Neil would not care and was glad that Andrew was comfortable enough around him to bring guys back home. He never dated anyone but had enough casual hook ups that Neil figured he was probably content with the way things were.

Neil went to his room and didn't want to run into either of them the rest of the night. He put in headphones and was glad he wouldn't be able to hear anything through the thin door walls.

He couldn't shake that weird feeling he got watching the two of them go to Andrew's room though. He felt an instant dislike for Jake but knew the guy hadn't done anything wrong. Neil blamed it on his upcoming midterm assignments just wearing him out. 

A little while later Neil heard a knock on his door. He opened it to find Andrew with slightly tousled hair but still looking put together after whatever he and that guy had just done together. Neil pushed down the slight disgust at the thought. He wasn't homophobic but something about this situation was bothering him. He didn't want to make Andrew uncomfortable so he settled for, "where's jake?"

"I made him leave. Want to go get waffles? I'm starving."

"Yeah sure."

They headed out to Andrew's car and drove over to their diner. Neil didn't want to bring up that guy anymore so he launched into a story about how annoying Kevin was at lunch today. Just going on about the history of the some obscure ancient civilization. Neil's commentary made Andrew not really laugh but come about as close to smiling as he ever would. They had a love-hate relationship with Kevin Day since he was Nicky's roommate freshmen year. Neil and him bonded for their mutual love over sports and running. Andrew and him with their ability to out drink just about anyone. 

"So Eden's on Friday? I figured this will get Nicky off my back for a while."

"Gonna bring Jake?"

"No, I'm not bringing someone else to watch out for besides Kevin and Nicky."

"Whatever you say."

"Actually, I bought you something for Friday. Might have to add you to the list too."

"Just tell me it's better than what Nicky made me wear last time."

"Much. People won't be able to keep their hands off of you."

Neil was somewhat curious to see what Andrew bought for him to wear this time. He did this on occasion since Neil had very few bar appropriate outfits. He imagined it would be much more form fitting than his usual attire. 

He didn't mind this at all though. He also didn't mind the way Andrew sometimes watched him and flirted with him. Neil would respond to it because they both had an understanding of each other. Andrew once told him he was glad he didn't make Neil uncomfortable. Even his twin, Aaron, had made a few comments to Nicky that came out somewhat homophobic. 

Neil had never cared. Andrew was so respectful of his boundaries that Neil was sure he would never cross a line.

Neil looked up from his plate to see Andrew staring at a guy across the room. Neil vaguely recognized him as a guy that lived on their floor last year. 

"Staring" Neil warned him.

"What? Want me to stare at you instead?

"Obviously. Ha I'm just saying subtlety is normally your style."

Andrew shrugged at this and didn't say anything else. For a second time that night, Neil shoved away that weird feeling of irritation. What was wrong with him today?


	2. Chapter 2

Eden's was never Neil's place of choice, but it was a little farther from campus than the downtown bars and that had its perks. It at least had fewer trashed college students and the guys were able to make friends with the bouncers and bartenders. 

And Neil had to admit. He did not hate what Andrew bought him for tonight. He was wearing black, skinny jeans that had a few purposeful rips in them. His shirt was a gunmetal gray color that was breathable. It was not overly flashy like some of the other outfits Nicky had gotten for him over the years. 

He never really thought of himself as attractive, but he knew the clothes must create some effect on him because after he put them on he had caught Andrew staring at him a few times. Nicky even complimented Neil on his choice of clothes and told him he was proud of him for finally learning how to dress himself.

No, Neil did not correct him.

Once inside Eden's Neil went with Andrew to get drinks. If Roland was working tonight there was a greater than likely chance Andrew would slip away to go hook up with him in the back room. He wondered if that was the real reason he had not brought Jake with them tonight.

Neil hoped that Andrew wouldn't ditch him and leave him with babysitting a belligerent Kevin, but he knew the odds weren't high. Again, Neil was happy for Andrew but still. That feeling was back. He just didn't want to picture Andrew in the back room with Roland's hands on him. For some inexplicable reason, it just bothered him. Andrew could do whatever or whoever he liked though so Neil decided not to say anything.

They brought the drinks back and Neil watched the other guys race through them as he sipped on his beer. He looked around and noticed a few people throwing glances in their direction, but Neil did not give any of them a second thought. 

Nicky and Aaron slipped away to the dance floor and Kevin, Andrew, and Neil stayed with the table. Kevin was getting drunk quickly and Neil could tell because he seemed to be pulling out his phone more and more. He and Thea were in the middle of a fight. They had been fighting for months it seemed like ever since Kevin had come out as bisexual. 

Neil secretly thought he and Thea weren't going to make it much longer. Neil thought Kevin had a crush on this guy Jeremy from his history class. In recent weeks, his talk of Thea began to slow, but the mentions of Jeremy picked up. Honestly, if Kevin found someone else to geek out about history with it was better for everyone. 

"I'll be back in a little" was all Andrew said to Neil before making his way to the bar. Neil felt irritated all over again. Andrew was leaving him again. And this time with a nearly blacked out Kevin. Fantastic. All so he could go hook up with some guy in the back room.

Neil knew he had no right to be annoyed at Andrew though. Nothing was keeping him here. Still, it bothered him.

"Hey Neil, do you think Thea's right?"

"About what this time Kev?

"Do you think I prioritize other things above her?"

"You're a history nerd and basically addicted to athletics. You know you do."

"But she has to know she's important. We've dated forever."

"Just tell her that. You know I'm not really the one to ask."

"Yeah but-" Neil was trying to get off of his barstool just when someone bumped into him. He lost his balance and knocked over his glass which broke on the floor. He picked up his hands to find some pieces of glass stuck in his palms. "Shit Neil are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine. Kev, will you be okay here by yourself?"

"Yeah. Let me at least text Aaron. He can tell you how to clean those out."

"It's okay. I'll handle it."

Neil went to the bar and asked one of the other bartenders for their first aid kit and pointed to their table to have someone clean up the rest of the broken glass. 

He took what he needed and went to the bathroom to clean up. Luckily, he avoided getting blood anywhere else noticeable and the cuts weren't too bad to clean. 

He made it back to their table and checked the time on his phone. They had only been there for an hour but Neil could not wait to leave. His hands throbbed and he was even less excited to listen to Kevin's drunk rants. 

"I leave for 20 minutes and then hear you're bleeding out Josten."

Andrew was back. Neil couldn't shake his irritation and in German replied, "you heard wrong. go back to Roland."

"Got a problem Neil?"

"Not at all."

"What happened to you?"

"Fell into broken glass."

"How graceful of you. Come on lets get out of here. Kevin won't be able to walk and I don't think they want you bleeding everywhere."

"What about Aaron and Nicky?"

"I give them 10 minutes before I leave them to Uber home."

They walked out to the car and basically had to carry Kevin. Neil thought it was hilarious honestly. Kevin towered over him and Andrew so it must've been quite the sight.

Nicky and Aaron appeared just before 10 minutes was up with complaints of "We just got here" "Can't we stay a little longer?"

Andrew quickly shut that down with "No. Kevin would've gotten us kicked out soon anyways and I don't trust whatever they gave Neil to clean his hands with." That settled it and they were on their way back to campus. 

Luckily, it wasn't a long drive and Andrew dropped off the other three and made Nicky and Aaron carry Kevin this time.

They got back to their apartment and grabbed their own first aid kit for Neil and a couple of water bottles.

"Can I look at them Neil?"

"Yeah go ahead." Neil couldn't help but think of how respectful Andrew was of him. Even asking permission before helping him out.

"Hey Andrew, I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier about Roland. I was just annoyed but it wasn't because of you. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

He just nodded in response and carefully cleaned out Neil's scraps. "You should probably let those air out over night. I'll help you bandage them tomorrow."

"Wow and here I thought Aaron was the pre-med twin."

"I know a thing or two."

"Thank you though. I don't think I could've stayed there any longer either."

"Why do you think I made us leave?"

Neil was confused by this revelation. He didn't think Andrew had been around long enough that night to notice how he had been less excited than normal to go. And how sick he felt after Andrew ditched him and then his hands. Maybe Andrew just always knew what Neil needed. They have been close friends and roommates for over a year now. Neil knew Andrew just as well by now.

"You saved me from having to listen to Kevin talk about Thea that is invaluable."

"Buy me ice cream tomorrow if you're going to keep thanking me."

With that they went to their rooms and Neil was suddenly much happier than he had been most of the night.


	3. Chapter 3

Neil just got back from the store carrying two containers of Andrew's favorite ice cream. One was a thank you and the other an apology. He knew it would sooth over his weird behavior from last night. He walked in to find Andrew making out with Jake on the couch. The sight made Neil feel ill. Like so nauseous he thought he might throw up. He was disgusted at himself for responding like this to Andrew with another guy like this.

"Oh sorry guys. Andrew here's some ice cream. I'm going to Allison's."

"Neil wait-"

He basically threw the ice cream at the coffee table and turned away. He shut the door behind him and forced himself to not run straight there. Seriously what was wrong with him? He didn't care about Erik and Nicky hooking up or when Nicky talked about other guys. He didn't care about Kevin being bi or even Allison and Renee's relationship. He never made any comments like Aaron but he could not shake this feeling. He was being a terrible friend to Andrew and that made him feel even worse.

By the time he made it to Allison's, he knew he wouldn't be able to say why he was really there. He would not reveal Andrew's sexuality over his weird upset feelings. He shook it off and forced himself to act normal.

Allison opened her apartment door and looked so excited to see Neil there. They had always been close friends ever since Neil ripped into some guy that had been a jerk to Allison. “What are you doing here?”

“I haven’t seen you all week aren’t I allowed to stop by?”

“Obviously. Get in here. We’re having a movie marathon with Dan and Matt all day.”

They all settled in for the movie. Matt looked over at him and asked “Neil what happened to your hands? You get into another fight?”

“No I just fell when I was trying to escape Kevin’s rants”

“He and Thea still fighting?”

“Worse than ever before. They need to break up.”

“Maybe they’ll end up working things out.”

“Matt you’re too positive. Have you been around him lately?”

“Not in a few weeks no.”

“Consider yourself lucky then.”

“Hey boys, gossip after the movie.” Dan called out over them. Neil glanced over and she and Matt were cuddling together on the coach.

“You guys don’t want the inside scoop to win the bet on when they’ll break up?”

Allison laughed “Neil you know I’ll win no matter what.”

True. Allison had an unprecedented winning streak in their friend group. She predicted Matt and Dan getting together as well as Aaron and Katelyn. She somehow knew everything that was going on. She always filled Neil in on everything and enjoyed his comments on everything. She was one of his closest friends and he came here to get his mind off of Andrew. He was happy to be surrounded by his other friends and not have any weird tension between them like he felt with Andrew.

He was still embarrassed to have walked in on him and about his reaction. It made no sense to Neil. He had no reason to react like this. He’d walked in on Nicky and Erik making out once and that hadn’t bothered him. Maybe it was just Jake. 

Neil stayed through dinner and avoided looking at his phone. Andrew would most likely have texted him to come back but Neil couldn’t face him yet. He needed to shake off his feelings 

It was late when he went back to the apartment but he was certain Andrew would be waiting for him. 

He got back home and had barely been there before Andrew came out of his room. 

“Back so soon?”

“I was just at Allison’s.”

“I didn’t think you were going to come back tonight with the way you ran out of here.”

“Sorry I was just embarrassed. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“I didn’t think you would be home.”

Neil studied Andrew and saw the blush on his face. He tried to hide it but it was obvious to Neil. Well at least if they were both embarrassed maybe they would get over it faster. 

“Neil do you have a problem with me hooking up with these guys? You’ve been acting weird lately.”

Neil hadn’t figured out why he had been acting like this. He had no reason to offer Andrew so instead he just offered “it’s not my business who you see but you know I don’t care that you’re gay. That doesn’t bother me.”

Andrew seemed more irritated at this but he didn’t say anything. He walked to the kitchen and pulled out some of the ice cream Neil bought for him earlier. 

“If you have a problem you better say it. You know I hate being lied to.”

“I don’t lie to you Andrew.”

He just shrugged. Neil felt the tension between them but just decided to fill Andrew in on the Kevin and Thea break up bet. 

They joked around for a little and Neil returned to his room. He knew things weren’t perfect between them but at least Andrew wasn’t upset with him still.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter for now, but Neil and Andrew have a moment of perfect understanding.

Neil woke up that night with dreams of his mother. She and his father died in a car crash when Neil was young. He sometimes still had vivid dreams of his mother screaming out to him, of him in the crash, and sometimes even Andrew replacing his parents in the aftermath. 

He shakily walked to the kitchen and tried to make some decaf coffee. He knew he most likely wasn’t returning to sleep but he didn’t want to be kept up just in case. Neil accidentally dropped his Palmetto State mug on the ground and watched it shatter every where.

Shit. Neil knee Andrew was a light sleeper and cringed when he realized he’d probably woken him up by that. Neil felt guilty for disturbing Andrew especially after their weird encounter earlier today. He both hoped Andrew would stay asleep and desperately wanted his company.

He started to clean up the pieces when he heard a voice behind him, “that eager to get more broken glass in your hands?”

Neil turned to look at him frowned “I didn’t mean to.”

“Let me take care of it. I don’t feel like bandaging your hands again tonight.”

Andrew kicked Neil out of the kitchen and moments later brought out two cups of coffee for them. “Talk”

“I just had a nightmare it’s fine.”

“You’re pale as shit and haven’t stopped shaking. Did you already go back on your ‘I don’t lie to you’ from earlier or do you want to try again?”

“I just kept hearing her screaming. She was calling for me to rescue her and when I finally found her she was wrecked. Car in flames. You know the story.”

Andrew moved closer to Neil and firmly touched the back of his neck. “You couldn’t have been there. There was nothing you could have done to help her. It is not your fault and this won’t bring her back.”

“I can’t control my dreams.”

“No but you will tell yourself this when you have one or you will get me and I will.”

“Alright.”

“I get them too you know.” Neil knew Andrew wasn’t admitting this lightly. Andrew had been abused in all his foster homes before finding his twin and cousin. It was another reason Neil could never be upset with him for dating and hooking up with whoever he wanted. He had worked so hard to let anyone in and sometimes he could barely stand to be around Neil. 

The admission was a firm reminder that after all Andrew had been through Neil needed to support him in this. He had been failing his friend lately and that hurt worse than listening to his mothers screams in his nightmare.

“Is that what you do?”

“I remind myself that you’re in the next room and I’m safe in the apartment. I know they can’t touch me anymore.”

Neil nodded. He knew Andrew had nightmares sometimes too but this was the first time he really talked about dealing with them.

Only once Neil found him having a panic attack in the living room until Neil had said “Andrew it’s me Neil. We’re the only ones here. We’re safe. Do you need me to leave?”

Maybe he had adjusted what Neil told him that time and had been using it ever since. 

They decided to turn on a movie and neither one really paid attention to it but neither returned to their room. They just sat in peaceful silence until Neil fell asleep on Andrew’s shoulder.


	5. Chapter 5

Neil was finally starting to act normal around Andrew again. His work load lessened after midterms and he thought maybe it had just been stress after all. Andrew always made him feel calmer and having strangers around made him feel uneasy. 

That’s all it was. That’s what Neil kept telling himself at least. 

They were in the middle of a lazy Saturday Harry Potter movie marathon when Andrew turned to look at him and just said “Jake is stopping by for a little by the way.”

Neil instantly felt all of his annoyance rush back. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t school related stress then. Maybe he was just annoyed Andrew was disrupting their movie marathon. They were almost to his favorite one after all and they probably wouldn’t make it there now. Ugh stupid Jake. 

“You’ve been seeing him a lot lately”

“He follows my rules well”

Neil nodded but he didn’t want to know anymore. He felt so sick he wasn’t even sure he could sit there anymore. Maybe it was Andrews subtle reminder about how hard this was for him. Maybe Neil was a little protective over him. The thought of any guy's hands on Andrew disgusted him. He still wasn’t sure how Andrew could stand anyone after his experiences in his foster homes. He should be happy for Andrew. That’s what he had to tell himself. 

Neil faked a smile and pretended like he wasn’t bothered by this at all. He wasn’t sure if Andrew was buying it by the looks he was giving him. 

Eventually, someone knocked on their door. Jake presumably. Neil looked at Andrew but he motioned to the door in a "are you gonna get that?" type of way. Neil rolled his eyes and got up. 

“Oh it’s you.”

“Yeah hi Neil. Andrew's here right?”

“Obviously”

Andrew must’ve walked into view of the doorway because Jakes expression brightened. “Andrew I brought something for you.”

He pulled a carton of Cherry Garcia. 

Neil just could not resist. “That’s Andrews least favorite flavor. Congratulations, you managed to purchase an overpriced ice cream brand with the only flavor in existence he doesn’t like.”

Jake looked a little embarrassed and just let out a quiet “oh”. Andrew finally decided to speak up, “Jake you know as long as it’s ice cream I’m eating it”

Andrew took the container and began to head to the kitchen. “I’ll meet you in my room” he said with a look to Jake. 

He waited for Jake to walk into his room before taking out a spoon and eating some of the ice cream. He made a face and then looked at Neil “I know you’re an asshole but could you dial it back. I wasn’t this rude to Melissa when you had her over.”

“No but she knew you didn’t like her and I was an asshole to her too.”

“Sounds like a personal problem. I didn’t make her feel unwelcome at least.”

“I’m pretty sure your glares did”

“I look at everyone like that. Still you had a fuck buddy over aren’t I allowed the same?”

“It’s not my business who you sleep with”

This comment only made Andrew more upset. They didn’t even say anything to each other for a few minutes. 

“If you have a problem say so Neil. I’m tired of this.”

“I don’t have a problem and I already told you I know it’s not my business.”

“Just stop acting like an asshole then would you?”

Neil didn’t say anything in response. He was so embarrassed about this. Andrew stalked off to his room and Neil felt so sick. 

He couldn’t picture Jake or anyone’s hands on Andrew and certainly didn’t want to. The thought made him feel like he was going to throw up. 

Neil just wanted this guy to leave. He hoped the guy would be gone soon. He could not stand this. 

Why was Andrew with this guy?

Oh god what if they actually started to date? Neil would have to find a way to be okay with this. Whatever it was that bothered Neil, he needed to put it aside. Andrew had always been supportive and Neil needed to do the same. Maybe his attitude was ruining something good Andrew was trying to build. 

Neil debated staying in his room the rest of the day but decided he couldn’t wait around anymore. Jake being there with Andrew was driving him insane. So again, he texted Allison asking if she wanted to hang out. She relied instantly with a “pick you up in 10!” 

Neil went outside as her car rolled up in front of the building. She waved to him to get in. He climbed in, buckled and she said “buying decorations for the Halloween party or going to the mall?”

“Halloween party” Neil knew they would still be busy in a few hours but if he got dragged to the mall Allison would make him buy more clothes he didn’t want or need. On multiple occasions she forced clothes on him and talked him into letting her style his hair. He simply wasn’t in the mood for that today though. 

She probably knew he would say that but didn’t push it. Allison could always tell when something was bothering Neil. 

“So not that I’m unhappy you texted but you look kind of upset. You and Andrew get into another fight?”

“No I just feel so guilty. Andrew has been seeing someone kind of and I was an asshole to them.”

Neil had to be careful with his wording. Honestly he probably shouldn’t even discuss this with anyone since it wasn’t his business. But he had to talk to someone about this. Usually Andrew was his go to, but how could he explain to him that his hook ups make Neil feel sick? Every time they’d even tried to talk about it Andrew got pissed off and Neil only more confused. 

“Neil we all know you’re a little asshole. He’ll get over it”

“But it keeps happening and I can’t stand it when they come over. I just spend the whole time wishing they would leave.”

“Did you ever think maybe you could be a little jealous of them?”

“No. What would I be jealous of? I don’t swing remember?”

“Well you could still be jealous of the attention he’s giving them.”

“I guess. I mean he’s been busier than normal lately.”

“Maybe you just need to make time to hang out with him. I know you see him all the time but even when I was living with Dan we would still make dinner dates. He’s coming to my Halloween party right?”

“I’ll ask him but probably”

“Good. Maybe then you won’t be so annoyed at this person”

“Doubtful”

“Trust me I know what I’m talking about. Now which fake pumpkins will make the best decorations?”

They continued to shop for a while. Allison always asking Neil’s opinion before doing what she wanted anyways. Which often meant not going with any of Neil’s suggestions. He thought about Andrew the entire time. Maybe Allison was right. He did feel annoyed that first time because they had been hanging out because it got interrupted. He would have to make things work. 

If he couldn’t, well Andrew deserved a better roommate. 

He was excited about going to the party with Andrew though. They had gone together every year since freshmen year. She always went all out and they had a great time. Andrew usually swiped the leftover candy from the party and ate it at home with Neil afterwards. They had a tradition of leaving Allison’s, coming home, and watching cheesy Halloween movies while Andrew tried to get sick off candy. Neil never took more than one or two pieces but Andrew, well last Halloween he ate about three bags worth. The memory alone made Neil smile. 

He picked up some Halloween candy for Andrew. Another apology in all honesty. He knew how to bribe him even if that guy didn’t. 

They made their way back to campus and Allison offered one last piece of advice. “I know what it’s like to be worried about losing your best friend. Not saying it’s the same situation as me and Renee, but I know you’ll work it out with Andrew if you try. He’s such a loyal friend to you I don’t think you could ruin it by being an asshole to his hook ups. Plus he has no excuse he’s an asshole too. Now get outta here” and she practically shoved him out of the car. 

Allison was right. Neil knew Andrew would forgive him but Neil also knew he needed his weird behavior to stop. It wasn’t fair to Andrew. He owed him the same loyalty and respect. 

When he got back to the apartment, he didn’t know if Jake or Andrew we’re still there. His door was shut but Neil didn’t hear anything and definitely didn’t want to. He left the candy he bought for Andrew on their kitchen table. He didn’t write anything. Andrew would see it and know what it meant. He only hoped Andrew would forgive him. 

Neil went to go finish some homework but his thoughts kept lingering back to Andrew. He was wondering what he thought of Neil’s actions and how serious he was with Jake. Neil was seriously beginning to dread being told they were dating now and having to act happy. Andrew wasn’t the dating type but Jake was becoming a more consistent fixture in his life. 

A knock on his door stirred him from his thoughts. Andrew stood there eating a piece of candy and looking at Neil. 

“I’m sorry for being an asshole earlier”

“Josten I know you have an attitude problem”

“Still I don’t want him to feel unwelcome”

Andrew just shrugged at this. “Where’d you go this afternoon?”

“Allison and I got stuff for her party. We’re going right?”

“Only if you made her buy the candy I like”

“Of course I did”

Andrew looked like he wanted to smile at this but instead his face went blank. “Will it stop bothering you if I just go to his place from now on?”

“It doesn’t-“

“Neil come on. I can tell something’s up.”

“It’s not my business who you hook up with or where you do it.”

Andrew rolled his eyes at this and went back to his room. Neil wanted to feel better after this, but he knew Andrew was still annoyed. Neil knew he was being an asshole but it didn’t make sense that Andrew kept getting upset when Neil would say it’s not his business. It wasn’t. He knew he wasn’t giving Andrew total honesty but how were you supposed to tell your best friend and roommate that him hooking up with guys bothered him? Did he suddenly develop some weird homophobia that only applied to Andrew? Nicky and Erik didn’t bother him. Neither did Renee and Allison. It make no sense. Maybe Allison was right and it was just a weird attention thing. He didn’t want to lose Andrew and he’d been spending more time with Jake recently. He knew he would definitely lose him if he couldn’t figure this out.


	6. Chapter 6

The day of the Halloween party came. Neil was so excited to finally get to hang out with Andrew and their other friends all night. They’d had a few busy weeks with school and work. He’d only seen Andrew in between classes and Matt and Kevin at the gym a few times. It was weird how you could all be together on the same campus and never run into anyone. He never ran into Aaron at all for example. He spent all his time in the Science Center or at Katelyn’s. Nicky had texted Neil about getting costumes but after being forced into a space cowboy costume freshmen year Neil kept refusing. 

Instead this year he and Andrew had plans to dress as the Cookie Monster and a cookie. The last two years they had dressed up with something easy they could dress as together. Neil got dressed and walked into the kitchen expecting to to find Andrew wearing the the blue suit and had he had picked out the other day and instead finding him wearing a ninja costume instead. It honestly wasn't a far cry from his usual look with the all black outfits and the armbands.

Neil was instantly confused. Andrew even came up with their costume idea this year. He had been excited for it, so why was he backing out now? Did he forget? As much as Neil wanted to believe this was the reason, he knew it was not. No, Andrew never forgot anything. 

“What are you doing?”

“Waiting for you so we can leave”

“No I mean why are you wearing that?”

“I made a deal with Jake”

His stomach dropped instantly. Just the sound of his name made Neil cringe. This whole thing just made no sense to Neil. He knew Andrew always upheld his deals but hadn’t the two of them already had one? Plus what could he have offered in return? Did this mean he had invited Jake to come tonight?

“Would’ve been nice to know you were ditching me”

“Oh relax. You’ll still look good.”

“I'll look like an idiot. Jake is coming then?”

“Don’t ask stupid questions.”

“Unbelievable. Why don’t you go pick up your boyfriend instead of waiting around for me?” Neil couldn't help himself but sneer in Andrew's face. How could he do this to him? This was their tradition. Was nothing theirs anymore?

Andrew had probably expected a negative reaction from Neil but not this bad. Neil watched the crack in Andrew’s facade when Neil said the word boyfriend. 

“Don’t call him that. He’s never going to be my boyfriend”

“You’ve been spending an awful lot of time with him. You’re usually the one to always tell the truth."

"I am. He's not my boyfriend and I don't want him to be."

"Even if that was true, I can’t believe you invited him tonight. It’s just supposed to be our friends.”

“Our friends all know him and don’t care. You’re the one with the problem here”

“I can’t stand the guy. Why’d you have to invite him” It came out harsh and Neil hated himself for it. Andrew's face was unreadable to Neil. He felt so sick for being an asshole to Andrew yet again about Jake. 

“You barely even know him and he’s only been nice to you”

“It doesn’t matter. He thinks he knows you so well. He doesn’t understand anything about your past and I can’t watch him hurt you”

“Is that why he bothers you so much?”

Neil felt so defeated. He couldn’t express what he was feeling. There was no way to put it in words how sick Neil felt thinking he would have to see Andrew and Jake together all night. He knew Andrew still hadn’t come out so it wouldn’t be overly affectionate but still they were supposed to hang out tonight. This was something Neil had been looking forward to.

He felt sharp disappointment and bitterness all at once. Maybe he wouldn't even bother going to the party after this. He couldn't stand the thought of watching those two together all night. Andrew should be hanging out with him. 

He briefly contemplated staying home, but he knew Allison or Nicky should show up and drag him to the party anyways.

“We were supposed to hang out tonight. You’re ditching me for him”

“And here I thought my best friend would be happy for me”

“He’s never going to be good enough for you”

"I thought you said it wasn't your business, Neil"

He had no way of explaining the rage inside him of Andrew choosing Jake over him. Jake was all wrong for Andrew. In his mind, Andrew deserved the absolute best.

"It's not. But Andrew, you're amazing. You deserve better than him." Neil just could not stop himself. He knew it was what Andrew wanted, but he just couldn't stand the idea. The wrongness of Jake and Andrew bothered him so much he just felt sick.

Jake was perfectly fine. Normal and boring. Neil wasn't even sure how that guy had held Andrew's attention for so long. Meanwhile Andrew was a person filled with strength and loyalty. He was understanding and respectful. He always had a funny comment or interesting view things. Jake simply had nothing to deserve someone like that.

"Your friends would laugh if they heard that."

"They're wrong."

“You’re unbelievable Neil Josten. I always knew you were a pipe dream.”

Words that sounded like they were meant to have fire behind them didn’t. His eyes dropped and he turned and left the apartment. Neil figured that meant he was done talking and instead went off to Jake’s.


	7. Chapter 7

After their weird fight from earlier, Neil waited and waited for Andrew to show up. He hadn't texted Neil to say he was on his way or anything. He assumed he went to get Jake, but he should have been here by now. 

There was no way Andrew would completely blow Neil off. He would provide some excuse at least. Maybe he had second thoughts about bringing Jake around all of their friends. 

As the party continued Neil kept sulking in the corner. Nicky came over a few times to try and keep Neil company, but Neil's sour mood was too much even for him. He was beginning to think something seriously wrong had happened to Andrew. There was no other reason he wouldn't show or text Neil unless he was hurt or something had happened.

What if something had happened and he felt like he couldn't trust Neil with it? He felt like he was ruining their whole friendship over his weird feelings. He just wished this would stop so they could be normal again.

Sick of letting his mind run though tons of terrible options, he slowly walked over to Renee.

"Hey, you haven't heard from Andrew have you?" 

Renee looked at Neil with a blank expression. She was the only one in their friend group who was closer to Andrew than Neil was. They had become friends instantly over some weird mutual understanding about their home lives. Both having terrible experiences in the foster care system before making it to the stable homes they lived in today must have provided a sense of comfort to the pair. 

He was beginning to think he made a mistake in asking when she finally answered, "Yes, but I thought he was supposed to come with you?"

"I thought he was too." The words felt like a knife twisting in his chest. He had been looking forward to tonight and now he had ruined it.

"Did he say when he was coming?"

"He didn't say much other than his plans were changing."

Wow as vague as always. 

He was irritated now. He just wanted to speak to Andrew again. He debated sending off a text of his own, but he knew if Andrew wasn't coming or hadn't said anything, then it was exactly for one reason. Neil.

He felt hurt that Andrew would blow him off like this. He had never done this before. He had at least sent some excuse on the rare occasion of him canceling on Neil. 

Neil played back their conversation from earlier. Maybe he misunderstood and he and Jake were going to a different party. Or maybe, Neil had ruined everything. He threw the boyfriend word in Andrew's face and flat out told him he couldn't stand the guy he was seeing. He was a terrible friend.

He knew how hard Andrew worked for this and he was being the least supportive, shittiest friend possible. This only made him feel worse.

Panic was beginning to set in. What if he had to move out? He felt so awful about thinking of Andrew dating or hooking up with any of these other guys but he deserved to do as he wanted. He was a terrible friend when Andrew had only supported and accepted him. He felt so sick just thinking about not having Andrew around anymore. If he were here, he would've placed a firm weight on the back of Neil's neck and talked him down from this already.

He knew Andrew was a loyal friend and he was not good enough for Andrew. Who had he been kidding earlier? Jake was probably perfect and he was the one fucking everything up. No wonder Andrew seemed so upset. Neil figured he would be too in his position. He just missed having his best friend around.

He tried to wait out the party, but he moved over to find Allison. He needed to talk to her about everything. She always gave Neil good advice and would back off if Neil said so. Neil decided he needed to trust her with everything this time. Maybe she was right and this was some weird form of jealousy.

She saw him approaching and smiled a little. She cut off her conversation with Dan and made her way towards Neil. She had probably made a bet about how long Neil would brood before coming to her. Neil would guess she had won that one.

"Oh Neil, what brings you to me today?

"I need to talk to you"

"Now or do you want to wait until the party is over?"

"Can we go now? I don't think I can keep it in any longer. I'm just so confused Al."

"Sure thing. Here let's go to my room."

She motioned something over to Renee before heading into their room. He shut the door behind them and sat on the bed. 

"So, what's been going on with you and Andrew? I mean that's what you wanted to talk about right?"

"You always know everything. But yeah, I just don't think these feelings are going away and I don't understand what's happening."

"What do you mean?"

"I just can't stand the idea of Andrew hooking up with other people. I walked in one them the other day and it made me actually sick. When they're over, I spend the whole time wishing they would just leave."

"Have you said anything to him about this?"

"No but I told him I can't stand this person he keeps seeing."

"Why?"

"They're not good enough for him and don't know him like I do. He always asks me if it bothers me to see him with them, but then I say its none of my business and he gets even more upset."

"Have you ever considered he might want you to be jealous of them?"

"No, he knows I don't swing. Why would he want that?"

"Neil I've seen him around you before. Whenever we all hang out he's distracted by you the whole time. It's the same look Matt gave Dan before they got together and how I was before Renee and I did."

"So you know which way he swings then?"

"More like a well educated guess. I knew Renee's sexuality was one of the reasons they never got together when everyone bet on it, but seeing the way he looks at you is another. I don't think anyone else figured it out though"

"Good. He would be even more pissed at me if I told everyone."

"Don't worry I've kept it to myself. But I've got to be honest Neil. I think you sound like a jealous boyfriend"

"Jealous boyfriend? But I don't swing. I've never wanted anyone like that."

"Neil, remember how I said this might not be exactly like me and Renee?"

"Yeah why?"

"I take that back."

"Wait is Allison Reynolds saying she was wrong?"

"No, the new information is helping though. Look, I thought I was straight before I saw my feelings for Renee for what they are. You remember that guy Seth I dated before her right? I thought I liked him but after we broke up I found myself not even caring. I was enjoying Renee's company too much and lines blurred and got confusing between us. All I'm saying is maybe you're not as asexual as you thought you were."

"I mean maybe. I've never felt like this before."

"It took me a long time to realize exactly what I wanted from Renee, but it sounds like you feel the same about Andrew. The jealousy is probably confusing for you because you've never wanted anyone else before."

Neil thought back to when Allison and Renee got together. They had some weird tension between them too before coming out as a couple. Then, they were closer together than ever.

He reflected on if he wanted Andrew like that. He had always felt comfortable around him and didn't mind the idea of Andrew touching him. But how was that different than his other friends? He still wasn't sure and he knew he could not say anything to Andrew just yet. He wanted to be sure of his feelings before risking it all. 

Did he really like Andrew?


	8. Chapter 8

Neil headed back to the apartment and waited for Andrew to return. It pained Neil to not know where he was or if he was okay or who he was with. He missed his presence at the party. He knew Andrew was probably still angry with him, but maybe Neil could really figure this out and fix everything now. He just needed Andrew back.

Talking to Allison made him feel better. He never would have considered that the reason he doesn't like Jake might be because he wants it to be him. The more Neil thought about it, the more he welcomed the idea of Andrew being together. But still he wasn't sure if it was just because he was always comfortable around him or that he wanted him. He always enjoyed Andrew's company, but maybe Neil had not realized what this really meant. 

It was all so confusing. He had never had a real interest in anyone how was he supposed to know?

He finally sent Andrew off a text to ask if he was coming home tonight. He was desperate for news about Andrew and wouldn't dare to ask Renee again. Nicky would be no help. He wasn't even sure if he would get a response after their fight earlier.

Neil had swiped any leftover candy that Andrew liked to bring home for him. He was hoping they could still have this one part of their Halloween tradition. 

He waited and waited and got more and more anxious for him to come home. He checked his phone and no response. He was getting more and more worried since he hadn't heard from him at all. He didn't want to leave the apartment in case Andrew came home while he was out. With no other option, he tried to trust that Andrew was safe. 

Neil was still upset he had been completely blown off earlier but now he was just worried. If Andrew didn't come home did that mean he was avoiding him? Or was he just busy with Jake? He wasn't sure which was worse. Maybe Neil would have to move out in the end after all.

This made Neil feel even more sick. He couldn't imagine living with anyone else. He enjoyed Andrew's dry humor, strong presence, and heavy hazel eyes that seemed to ground him. If he was really causing Andrew this much pain though, he would give it up. Neil never wanted to cause him any pain. Andrew was never really happy, but he thought they were content at times. Andrew had already been through so much, Neil would do anything for him.

He missed him. Tonight was supposed to be them hanging out and Andrew stuffing himself with candy. It was so empty in the apartment without Andrew.

How had things gone so wrong?

Neil knew he could only blame himself. He had been an asshole to Andrew's whatever that guy is. He had made things awkward and tense with Andrew for weeks now. And then to tell him Jake wasn't good enough for him? Where did Neil have the right to say any of that?

He just was having trouble expressing to Andrew that he thinks Andrew deserves only the best. Someone who knows there are better flavors out there than Cherry Garcia for sure. Neil knew Andrew better than he knew himself sometimes. He could see the loyalty and strength pouring out of Andrew. Neil knew some of their other friends judged him a little, but they didn't see him like Neil did. They hadn't bothered to look and honestly Neil believed they were missing out on one of the most incredible people. 

He flipped open his phone and looked back at random pictures he had of Andrew or the two of them together. All of the sudden his breath caught in his chest. 

There was a picture from Neil's birthday from the previous year. Neil was in the process of unwrapping Andrew's gift to him. It was a copy of one of Neil's now favorite books, but the expression on Andrew's face stopped Neil dead. 

It was clear to Neil to see the faint smile on Andrew's face. In fact, he looked so peaceful and almost happy in this picture, it made his heart clench. His eyes were only on Neil. It struck Neil that this was what he wanted. He didn't understand it, but he wanted this closeness. Maybe he had always believed they were just friends, but he wanted more. He didn't know what that meant or if it was even possible but this was it.

Neil tested out thinking "I like Andrew" to himself. Thinking of the weight of each word. He wondered if this was how Allison felt. When she realized she was not as straight as she once thought. Neil didn't exactly know what he was, but he wanted Andrew.

He wanted Andrew to always look at him with that level of intensity. Andrew saw Neil like no one else did. He never wanted to see Andrew look that way at anyone else. If Andrew suddenly came back and announced he was dating Jake now, honestly Neil didn't know what he would do.

Did Andrew even like him like that? Just because they had been close didn't mean anything. Andrew never would have tried to come onto Neil knowing he didn't swing, but if Neil showed interest, would it even matter? Just because Neil had figured this out didn't guarantee Andrew would return his feelings. After Neil had treated him like this, he wouldn't be surprised if Andrew never spoke to him again.

Eventually, Neil decided that yes, he had to say something. It terrified him. How could anyone want him? With his scars and trouble past? Yes, Andrew had his share of baggage, but Andrew deserved someone whole and strong for how hard he had to work to get to where he is. Not someone who had been rude and jealous.

He hoped Andrew would at least let him voice everything. He desperately needed to explain. That slight bit of hope was killing Neil inside. The hope that Andrew might be interested. It could really be just them from now on. The idea was intoxicating to Neil. He wanted so badly to make this a reality.

Neil waited up as long as he could, but he eventually drifted off to sleep. Woken up only by Andrew stepping through the apartment door.


	9. Chapter 9

"Oh. Hey" was all Andrew said when he spotted Neil. He didn't offer an excuse or anything for where he had disappeared to.

"I wasn't sure if you were coming home."

"I wouldn't up and run on you." Neil knew it was a dig at him, but he let it go. He had to bring up his potential feelings to Andrew and was already nervous enough.

"What? No more asshole comments for me tonight?" was all Andrew said when Neil stayed silent.

"Why didn't you come to Allison's?"

"I can only be so self-destructive Neil."

Neil looked at him confused and didn't respond. 

He wasn't sure what Andrew had meant, but he needed to work up courage and say this now, or he never would. He started to second guess himself but the second Andrew went for his room Neil blurted out, "wait".

"I have to talk to you about something. It's important."

"It's about me and Jake isn't it? Time to fess up what's been bothering you."

"It is about Jake"

"I knew it. I knew you weren't really happy for me. I can't believe you of all people wouldn't understand why this is so important."

"No its not that." Neil steadied himself before finally admitting, "I think I'm jealous of Jake." 

"You could find someone to hook up with if you wanted. Maybe you don't notice the attention, but you wouldn't have a problem finding someone." Andrew slightly blushed while saying this. Maybe he was just surprised Neil even brought this up. They never talked about it much.

"No, it's not that. I'm not jealous of that."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I'm jealous of Jake being with you."

"You just miss us hanging out?"

"No Andrew."

"But you don't swing. What else is there?"

"You. I'm jealous because he gets to be with you. I think it's taken me so long to recognize this because I never have before, but I don't want you to be with him because I want you to be with me."

"Don't say things you don't mean Neil."

He was just struggling with how to word this perfectly. Andrew would notice Neil's seriousness about this and stop pushing him away if he kept going.

"Andrew, there's no easy way for me to talk about this. This is all so new to me, but I've come to realize I'm attracted to you. The reason I don't like Jake is because I want it to be us. If you don't feel the same, I'll move out or leave you alone. I just needed to get this out because its tearing me apart. I know your flirting with me was never real, but maybe if you give me a chance? I don't know where I'm going with this...." He trailed off and started to walk to his room when Andrew didn't respond. His heart sank. Obviously Andrew wouldn't want him. Neil could never picture himself with anyone. Well except Andrew, but that didn't mean he would feel the same.  
Of course. Andrew knew how broken he was from his past. With his scars and nightmares. He was a mess. He somehow knew Andrew made it all better, but he would give that up for Andrew's happiness.

Fine. It would be fine. He could move on from this.

Before he even made it to his room, he felt Andrew's hand lightly grab his wrist.

"You're an idiot."

"Wow thanks."

"Neil, look at me." He slowly turned and faced the heavy weight of Andrew's hazel eyes.

"I have been interested in you since we met freshmen year. I've been trying to get over my feelings for you this whole time. That's all Jake is to me. Or anyone I ever saw. It's always been you. Everything I said to you was real."

"You like me?"

"Yes I thought I just made that clear? But you never had an interest in anyone before, so I did everything to convince myself I never had a chance. It's why I got so pissed when you would say it wasn't your business."

"But I thought you liked Jake."

"No no, and he knew I had feelings for you. It was pretty obvious to him."

"I was such an asshole to him"

"You really were. Are you sure about this though? I don't want you to force yourself into this."

"Yes. I've never been more sure of something. I want you Andrew"

"Can I kiss you, yes or no?"

"I thought I just made that clear?" When Andrew looked unimpressed at having his own words thrown at him, Neil followed up with "Yes, always with you."

Andrew's lips brushed Neil's and the whole world seemed to stop. This was amazing. Neil thought he could do this forever. Andrew kissed him with such intensity it made Neil's head spin. He could get drunk off this feeling.

Too soon, Andrew pulled away. He studied Neil's face and seemed pleased by whatever he saw. He moved away from Neil and went over to the pile of candy Neil grabbed after the party for him. He pulled out a few pieces and began eating them.

"Think you can break last years record?

"Easily, but there might be other things I prefer doing with my mouth tonight."

Neil blushed at this. He suddenly felt acutely shy at having such limited experiences with anyone let alone a guy. He tried to reassure himself, it was just Andrew. But that was also the problem. It was Andrew. The only one that mattered to Neil.

Neil joined him on the couch, they turned on a random Halloween movie, and instead of eating three bags of candy, Andrew kissed Neil senseless instead.


	10. Chapter 10

"So you guys are like together now?" Matt asked with a confused look on his face.

"Yup, turns out I do swing, but just for Andrew." Neil told them all with a grin.

Andrew hadn't really wanted to come out yet, but he knew it was the best decision for them. For all of their friends to see that they were a couple now and that they better get used to it. Neil knew having interest in someone like Andrew was rare and he didn't want to give it up. He planned to stick by Andrew's side no matter what from here on out.

"What?! How come no one told me Andrew was gay" Nicky kept saying on repeat. He was excited that Aaron was now the odd one out among the cousins.

"I guess Allison really does never lose a bet" Dan said with a sour tone. "She had insider information though that's like cheating"

"Not uh. I figured out what was going on and was the one to basically spell it out for poor Neil here."

"Wait so what about that other guy who was hanging around Andrew the last few weeks? Jake was it?"

Neil was very grateful to his nosey friends for once. He probably never would have figured it out without Allison's advice. 

"I ended things" was the only answer Andrew was willing to give.

After Neil and Andrew confessed their mutual feelings, Andrew ended it with Jake. They hadn't been more than just a convenient hook up, but Neil was satisfied to know Andrew was entirely his now. 

Andrew had confessed that he had been using Jake, Roland and any other guy he had been with as a way to get over Neil. Thinking he had little to no chance with Neil, he did everything he could to swallow his feelings. He had even gone so far as to tell some of them he had feelings for someone else so it was hook up or nothing. Neil felt honored at how deep Andrew's feelings went for him. He knew Andrew and him fit well together, but he wished he could have figured out his feelings sooner.

Once he pieced everything together, it was easy to see his feelings for Andrew. It was even easier to see how Andrew had feelings for him. He was never really warm to anyone other than Neil, but he had been particularly rude to Neil's one time hook up buddy. Neil began to think back and notice all of the selfless things Andrew had done for him.

He was beginning to appreciate his boyfriend on a much deeper level than before. It was like a looking through a camera and everything suddenly coming into focus. Having Andrew like this meant everything was sharp, bright, and in full color now. He could feel the weight of Andrew's eyes on him at all times. He had returned it with staring of his own, which Andrew always commented on. 

They were still taking it slow. Neil was definitely inexperienced compared to Andrew, but they respected each other's boundaries. Andrew already placed large amounts of trust in Neil and he would do everything to keep Andrew's faith in him.

They spent the rest of the afternoon having a lazy day watching movies with their friends, but now, Neil noticed light touches from Andrew. Sometimes he would run his fingers through Neil's hair or hold onto his hoodie's sleeve or tap the back of Neil's hand. The slight touches made Neil feel warm, comfortable, and safe. He felt whole for the first time in his life. 

"Happy about something Josten?" Andrew whispered in his ear.

"Maybe a little"

"Just wait til we go home" Neil heard the promise in Andrew's words.

The idea warmed Neil to the core. His current sweatshirt was hiding some of the bruises Andrew had left on Neil's neck from the past few nights. 

"That reminds me I have something for you"

"It's too soon for an anniversary."

"No for your birthday. It is tomorrow you know."

"Oh. You know I don't really celebrate that."

"Andrew Minyard turning down the opportunity for cake and ice cream?"

"That is the maximum I celebrate"

"Not this year."

Neil already had the whole day planned out for them. He got the picture of him and Andrew he found the other night framed. He also bought a new book he thought Andrew would like. For his last gift, he was planning on going to the animal shelter to finally adopt a cat like they had been wanting to for years now. Neil didn't see a point in waiting any more. He planned to cook Andrew his favorite dinner before meeting all of their friends at Sweetie's for cake and ice cream followed up by drinks. 

He wanted to spoil Andrew on a day he normally never celebrated. He may have hated this day, but Neil wanted to show Andrew how important he was to Neil and that he was worth celebrating. He looked forward to seeing the crack in Andrew's expression when he opened his gifts later on.

He could get used to doing things like this for Andrew all the time. He was so lucky. 

"Let's go home now"

Without another word, Andrew grabbed his hand and they got up. Neil quickly said good bye to their friends and they went immediately to their apartment. 

Neil only gave Andrew the framed picture of them for tonight and wanted to save the other gift for tomorrow, but watching Andrew open his gift was amazing. 

His lips quirked up slightly and he responded with a simple "158%" before tugging Neil closer and kissing him. Neil wanted to remember this forever. 

"Stop looking at me like that"

"Like what?"

"Like I mean everything to you."

"I don't know how else to look at you."


End file.
